NewsJack Series 20 Episode 1
A new series so I better get writing
I did struggle getting back into the swing of things but I will be submitting something for every episode of this series of NewsJack
- Tehran has banned driving in cars with dogs. Why don’t they just stop giving dogs driving licences?
- Super Bowl news! The Northern Saw-whet beat the Andaman Boobook for ‘Best Plumage’ in 2019! Sorry, that should have been Superb Owl news.
- Thieves used sewers to empty a bank vault. Eye-witnesses describe the gang of four as aged 13-19, genetically affected by radiation, versed in martial arts and, strangely, being turtles.
I wanted to submit a Super Bowl joke as I love the superbOwl joke. I also know that one of my superbowl jokes was in the script before but not broadcast so I put it back in.
The TMNT joke had a couple of re-writes and I ended up here. For some reason I removed the word ‘well’ from infront of ‘versed’ which makes the joke harder to read.
Next up was Newsjackpedia. A section I don’t enjoy as really its not clear what the team want. Do they want wordplay or do they just want silliness.
- ‘Churchilling – To remember the ‘good old days’ of World War 2 and blitz spirit without having lived through World War 2 or the blitz.
- ‘Maroon Fiveing’ – To disappoint everyone when you are given your biggest chance to impress everyone.
- ‘Morganing’ – To present the moral high-ground on morning television when you presided over the hacking of phones and the publication of fake Prisoner-of-War pictures.
Churchilling I enjoyed
Maroon Fiving was trying to get more superbowl stuff in
Morganing got reworded a few times…I was trying to make sure I’d not be sued!
None of my jokes made the broadcast. I’m not suprised!